Paige Barnes

May the joy of the Lord be yours this Christmas! As I reflect on all that has happened in the life of my family this year, I realize that God has been teaching me. I don't know that I've always heard him at the time, but it's flooding me now. It's in the hard times that we grow the most. And through some very hard times this year the Lord has done so much for us. We've been introduced to a new church family and found a place where God wants us to be. We've grown closer as a family. We've stepped out of comfortableness into the unknown and unsure and seen that God will hold us and He will provide and do amazing things. There is a fire burning in me to reach the world for Jesus...at least my corner of the world. I see the Lord positioning us....slowly, but surely. I will follow Christ wherever he leads even if it takes forever. I have whined and complained and cried and pouted and once I even kicked the kitchen cabinets. I have been through the ent...

This weekend we drove up to Nashville to see my mom and to also see the lights at The Opryland Hotel. On our way there, my son said something funny which caused me to really think. It was night and he saw the lights blinking on a cell phone tower. He couldn't really see the tower itself because it was night, and he said to the hubbs, "Hey Daddy, do you see that invisible tower"? We both chuckled, but that made me think. How many times do we miss something that's right in front of our face? We don't see it, but it's there? I thought about this time of year and how statistics will prove that depression and suicide rates are higher this time of year. Crazy, huh? Seems like people seem to lose hope at a time of year when many of us are celebrating the greatest hope of all. I recall a story I've read about a people waiting and watching for a savior, a messiah. Then one night in the cold, damp, feeding trough of a barn with filled with animals, the gre...

Well, our trip to the endocrinologist was pretty uneventful. I guess that's good. He weighed 53 lbs and was 3'11". He's catching up to me! His A1C was up from 6 to 8.2. I knew it would because of all the highs he's had since we last went in. Doctor seems to think he's still coming out of his honeymoon period and that is why he's having the highs. She made some adjustments in his insulin and we are going to see if that will help. I hope so! We'll have our pump at the first of the year and go back to see her in March. So we keep on keeping on. He's doing good and we've got to get these blood sugars under control - try to keep him in his target range. It's hard as they are younger because they are growing and that causes the blood sugar to fluctuate. But still, this momma nurse and his engineer dad try really hard! He asked Santa for a cure for diabetes for Christmas. What a wonderful gift that would be! We sent a thank you to s...

Tomorrow we go to see the endocrinologist for the boy's 3 month check-up. They should do an A1C and I am little nervous about that. His blood sugars have been higher since we saw the doctor 3 months ago. We strive to keep his A1c where the doctors want it because this will help him down the road hopefully avoid the serious complications that can do along with diabetes. The higher your blood sugar is over a longer period of time, the higher your A1c is. So, we'll see how tomorrow goes. I talked to the Animas rep today about our insulin pump and we should be getting it right after the first of the year. We researched all the ones on the market and decided that the Animas One Touch Ping was the best choice for the boy. His will be black and not the pink one you see above. We'll have another learning curve when it comes in and we learn how to use it, but I am excited for the freedom and better control it will give the boy. We are looking for a babysitter. We had a gre...

My prayer for you today... "So we have continued praying for you ever since we first heard about you. We ask God to give you a complete understanding of what he wants to do in your lives, and we ask him to make you wise with spiritual wisdom. Then the way you live will always honor and please the Lord, and you will continually do good, kind things for others. All the while, you will learn to know God better and better. We also pray that you will be strengthened with his glorious power so that you will have all the patience and endurance you need. May you be filled with joy, always thanking the Father, who has enabled you to share the inheritance that belongs to God's holy people, who live in the light. For he has rescued us from the one who rules in the kingdom of darkness, and he has purchased our freedom with his blood and has forgiven all our sins." - Colossians 1:9-14 NLT ~Paige

The Christmas season is here. We are doing some serious remodeling of our home, and I am so enjoying all the Christmas decorations because they take the focus off of all of that craziness! I thought I would post a few of the Christmas pics here. Hopefully tomorrow we will get our annual Christmas picture taken and get our cards printed and mailed. I will post that pic soon. I hope that this Christmas season brings your much joy and blessing. May you be blessed by the knowledge that our Lord and Savior Jesus came to earth as a baby and grew into a man who died to set us free. Hallelujah!

This is a random post, so bear with me. Had a good night at work last night and go back tonight. I didn't realize how much I missed being a nurse, but I am loving every minute of it and the people I work with are fabulous! I get to start picking up some shifts in the ER and ICU soon. Oh yes, I am very excited about this. So next week brings a class to refresh myself on reading the heart rhythm strips. Being out of the field for a few years, I am having to relearn a few things, but that's ok. I like a challenge (most days)! Coming in late last night, the family was asleep and I spent some quality time with the TV and a sundrop. I discovered a delightful little show called "Blush". I guess it's like the Project Runway of the make-up world. Oh, it was delightful. Then I watched two episodes of Rookies on A & E. I love that show! Kind of interesting line-up, huh? My current read, "When God Whispers Your Name" by Max Lucado is so speaking to ...

To those of you who read this blog, thank you for your sweet words of inspiration and encouragement after my post yesterday. You may never know how much they mean to me. I guess as the nurse/mom/wife/firstborn/type A personality, I always try to be strong and keep it together. Several of you mentioned to me that what I am feeling is ok . I really needed to hear that. I think just hearing that it's ok that I am angry or depressed or sad sometimes helped push me to the next place - which just may be acceptance again. I am reading a very old book by Max Lucado called "When God Whispers Your Name". I got home from working last night around 11:30 and couldn't put it down. I guess I finally settled into bed around 4am this morning! I've had that book for at least 10 years but have never read it. Yesterday I was just kind of drawn to it. That book and your sweet words and constant dialogue with the Lord are lifting me up. I am so thankful that God hangs in t...

I just realized that I am moving through the stages of grief. Even though I am a nurse and have done my fair share of counseling others as well, I guess I didn't realize that having your 6 year old only child diagnosed with diabetes would send you into the stages of grief. But I have been in them and apparently I am still moving through them. In some ways it's compounded by the fact that our family members (namely moms) have been busy with their own issues. They haven't really been there to help. I feel alone sometimes. Like nobody understands. I guess it would be nice to know that someone could watch the boy so the hubbs and I could have a date once in awhile. But so much has changed since the diabetes. Our family doesn't live in the same town as us and when they are in town they don't come by or call. I know they will read this and I'll probably be looked at as the bad guy (again), but it's how I feel. I've had to deal with their issues and ...