12/3/08

Big girl panties, Rookie Cops, and Jesus

This is a random post, so bear with me.

Had a good night at work last night and go back tonight. I didn't realize how much I missed being a nurse, but I am loving every minute of it and the people I work with are fabulous! I get to start picking up some shifts in the ER and ICU soon. Oh yes, I am very excited about this. So next week brings a class to refresh myself on reading the heart rhythm strips. Being out of the field for a few years, I am having to relearn a few things, but that's ok. I like a challenge (most days)!

Coming in late last night, the family was asleep and I spent some quality time with the TV and a sundrop. I discovered a delightful little show called "Blush". I guess it's like the Project Runway of the make-up world. Oh, it was delightful. Then I watched two episodes of Rookies on A & E. I love that show! Kind of interesting line-up, huh?

My current read, "When God Whispers Your Name" by Max Lucado is so speaking to me right now. I should be finished with it by the end of the week.

And it was all enjoyed nicely in the backdrop of my house filled with Christmas decorations. We are currently remodeling and pulling up floors and pulling off wallpaper so it's hard to feel like the place looks decent, but the Christmas decorations are taking the focus off and I am enjoying that. For my Christmas present, I asked the hubbs to finish the front bathroom and paint the foyer, sitting area, and dining room. Yay! We'll be closer to having this place looking like new and ready for people to come over for dinner parties and such.



It seems that my post on grief has garnered a few mixed emotions. It was actually very freeing for me. I don't always speak my mind because I am a good southern girl and I hate strife and I don't like confrontation. Mostly support came, but it did cause some strife and I pray that we can resolve that soon. I know that I am praying about it and God is speaking to me about it. I was upset about the whole thing on the way to work last night, but the Lord so blessed me with the words of two songs. I am also putting on my BIG girl panties and climbing out of this pit of depression and despair I have been in. For I can't live as those who have no hope! This post and some conversations with some of you and some deep, intimate time with my Jesus have led me to a place of acceptance and freedom! I must post the song lyrics here for you to read as they are speaking so very clearly to me right now. The first is "Something Heavenly" by Sanctus Real.

It's time for healing, time to move on
It's time to fix what's been broken too long
Time to make right what has been wrong
It's time to find my way to where I belong
And there's a wave that's crashing over me
And all I can do is surrender

Time for a milestone
Time to begin again
Reevaluate who I really am
Am I doing everything to follow your will
Or just climbing aimlessly over these hills
So show me what it is you want from me
I give everything I surrender...

Time to face up
Clean this old house
Time to breathe in and let everything out
That I've wanted to say for so many years
Time to to release all my held back tears

Whatever you're doing inside of me
It feels like chaos but somehow there's peace
You're up to something bigger than me
Larger than life -something heavenly

Whatever you're doing inside of me
It feels like chaos but now I can see
This something bigger than me
Larger than life something heavenly
Something heavenly

It's time to face up
Clean this old house
Time breathe in and let everything out

The other song is "Shadowfeet" by Brooke Fraser



Walking,stumbling on these shadowfeet
Toward home, a land that i've never seen
I am changing: less and less asleep
Made of different stuff than when i began
And i have sensed it all along
Fast approaching is the day

[CHORUS]
When the world has fallen out from under me
I'll be found in you, still standing
When the sky rolls up and mountains fall on their knees
When time and space are through
I'll be found in you

There's distraction buzzing in my head
Saying in the shadows it's easier to stay
But I've heard rumours of true reality
Whispers of a well-lit way

You make all things new

When the world has fallen out from under me
I'll be found in you, still standing
Every fear and accusation under my feet
When time and space are through
I'll be found in you

May these words encourage you today.

~Paige

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