10/26/08

Life...in general...is tiring sometimes.

So, it's been awhile since I posted. There's a very good reason for that. Life!!! I am so tired. Monday, I was supposed to go to work at a local hospital here. I'm going to be working some part-time shifts as a nurse on the medical floor and in the ICU and ER. Monday was to be my first night to orient to the new facility (get to know where everything is and the policies and procedures and all that jazz). However, Monday I had to make a 2 hour trip to get a family member some help. I was called and asked if I would come take this person to an emergency room up where she lives and help her get some psychiatric treatment. She was depressed and somewhat suicidal. We spent the night (well until 2am) in the emergency room for part of the time and then in a lock-down facility for the rest of the time as they tried to assess her and decide what treatment she needs. She was seeking inpatient treatment but that wasn't available to her and they didn't think she was dangerous enough to be admitted so she was sent home. I stayed with her that night and we returned to the psychiatric hospital the next morning. A whole other world that is. I missed another night of orientation on Tuesday. Anyway, I had to head home and another family member is staying with her. She goes everyday for outpatient group therapy and sessions with the psychiatrists. Please say a prayer that she finds the help she needs and that she is willing to do what it takes.

On that note, there is another person in our life who needs similar help but won't seek it and we are worn out. Life is tough.

We were able to go to our new life group on Wednesday and what a blessing it was. We are so thankful God has placed us in the particular group of people. For the first time (maybe ever), my amazing husband spoke up and shared his heart. I'm not sure there was a dry eye in the house - his included. There's a lot down deep inside him that is hurting about some things and I could tell that in what he said. But he spoke with wisdom and passion and truth. Let me say - I fell in love with him all over again!!!!

On Thursday I tried to catch up our homeschooling as we missed Tuesday completely and Wednesday wasn't much because I was so tired. I went into work until 11pm that evening. I had a great shift! The people I worked with were very helpful and kind and it was so nice to use my nursing skills again. I knew I was a little rusty since it's been a few years, but I found that it's all coming back fairly quickly. I work tomorrow, Tuesday, and Thursday.

On Friday, we had to leave the house at 6:30am to head to the endocrinology clinic to learn about insulin pumps. The boy will be getting on one soon, and we went to a class to learn all about the ones available. We came home much more informed and with arm loads of information. Tomorrow we will be calling the insurance company to have them answer some questions so that we can make the best decision possible. Once he gets it, the boy will wear it for 4 years and so we have to make a good, informed choice. We have narrowed it down to three: The One Touch Ping, the Medtronic MiniMed, or the Omnipod. The boy wants the Omnipod because Nick Jonas wears it, but there is much more to consider than just that. He is testing one out right now to see how he can deal with it. So far so good with his compliance. But he's 6 so we have a lot to consider.

Well, this week has been a long and tiring one. Here's to hoping next week is better.

Jesus peace,
~Paige

5 comments:

The Kelly's said...

You have so much on your plate right now- I am in awe of you. If I can ever do ANYTHING to help you or any of your family members, DO NOT HESITATE to call on me. I love all of you!

How is the homeschooling going? I have tossed the idea around. However, it may take much convincing to my husband.

LOVE YOU ALL!

Anonymous said...

You have had a really busy week and I bet you are tired! I know that your family member is thankful that you did what you had to for them and I am betting that they will do the things they need to to be healthy because of the love that you and other family members have for them. God bless you in the weeks to come with good days at work, happy times with the church group, and satisfaction with the home-schooling progress!

Anonymous said...

I hear you and can relate somewhat to what you must be going through. It was 2 years ago today that my husband overdosed on over 200 pills, trying to commit suicide. I think it was really more a cry for help. It's a long story, but he had been out of work for some time and dealing with a horrible past and PTSD. He is a Christian, but has had to deal with a lot of skeletons in his closet. Since then he has received godly council and we found a great Christian therapist.

In the meantime I was the sole provider for nearly 3 years and suffer with my own problems, i.e. wanting to be in control and be the conscience for everyone around me. I have some OCD issues as well. It took a tole on me...work became a tipping point where I could not handle it any longer, and had I geuss what you'd call a nervous breakdown, so I have been on leave since March of this year. I am not going back to the company that I worked at, but through this all, my husband got a job and has really surrendered his life over to the Lord. He gets up early each day and reads almost the word faithfully (not missing many days). I see so much growth in him. Thank the Lord!

So, in the midst of some of the worst times is when God is really working the most. I pray that the Lord will give you the strength that you need. His Grace is suffienct for you. Don't neglect yourself in the process. God Bless!

Anonymous said...

I can kind of relate to you in a way. It was 2 years ago today that my husband overdosed on about 200 pills, trying to commit suicide. I think it was really more a cry for help. He had been out of work for some time and was dealing from a horrible past and things that were now coming to surface that he supressed for so long. He became a Christian, later in life, but was struggling big time. After this happened we found a Christian Therapist that was able to meet him at his level and although painful to talk about, he was able to work through some of the skeletons in his closet. He was suffering from PTSD.

In the meantime I was the sole provider for nearly 3 years. This took a tole on me. I also had my issues that I was dealing with, i.e. control freak, feeling compelled to be everyone's conscience, feelings of guilt, and OCD issues. I finally hit a tipping point with my work and went on leave in March of this year. It was a culmination of many things - my perfectionism, not being able to deal with ambiguity very well, guilt, feeling overwhelmed, and on and on. I pretty much had a nervous breakdown. I am not going back to my job and am not sure what the Lord has for me next, but I am doing a lot better.

I will say that in the darkest of times is when the Lord is working the most even if we don't see it or feel it. That's when we need to keep on keeping on. Just remember that you need to take care of yourself in the process when helping others - don't neglect yourself.

I will be praying for you.

God Bless!

megaphonic said...

i like that omnipod ping! partially because it has a cool name, true, but it come in neat colors! still no racing stripe though...

:)

we're with ya, paige. anything you need from jess or myself, you've got. i know we're a ways away, but we'll do all that we can. we pray for ya'll regularly.

keep it up!